whatcha ma call it.

phoning it in. dropping the ball. taking a backseat.
however you want to phrase it...that's me lately. i don't know what has gotten into me.

i haven't really taken a picture for a while. i haven't updated my project life in FOREVER. i usually have about 7 to 8 ideas for posts a week for this space and lately it's been blank.
yes i have been doing things around here. the laundry is done. the people are fed. the rooms are kinda clean. dog is walked. bikes are rode. flowers are planted. bills are paid. life is lived.
but my outlet life? dead. slow. riga-mortis.

the garden is in crazy bloom and by this time last year i had filled a memory card documenting all the hard work we had put in the year before. this year? hardly any. guilty.
all of the bulbs that we painstakingly planted last fall popped up with pride and the garden is bursting. gorgeous. so proud!! and thanks to tony getting on it and mowing the lawn it doesn't look as getto as it did last week when i was pouting about it.
but...did i take a picture or two? nope. do i know why? nope.
i have had a lot on my mind.
we do have some big changes going on here and we were occupied with another possibility.
i guess i have been preoccupied.

i don't like it.

i like being to lord over the documenting-every-breath-we-take domain.
taking too many pictures till my computer stops speaking to me.
of writing everything down.
of recipe testing and sharing it with you all.
i'm just so tired for some reason.

i guess i better get my giddy-up on and re-focus.
thanks for the ear.



Anonymous said...

Not sure if it helps . . . but if it comes down to documenting things or living them, at least you've picked the right path of those choices--for now.

Do you miss doing the things you did last year? Or are you only feeling like you SHOULD be missing them? I think that's important because it's okay to something different as long as it's what you want to do. You shouldn't let memories of what you did before trap you.

Any chance of your getting a little time alone so that you can think about it all?

Elizabeth Flora Ross said...

First of all, I love these pictures! Second, I can relate to your feelings. I believe we all go through this. Writing was an outlet that saved my sanity when my daughter was a baby, and has continued to do so. However, life does have a way of getting in the way. There is nothing wrong with LIVING and putting family first. We can experience things and build memories without capturing them in words or photographs. But again, I relate to what you are saying. Give yourself a break. Moving forward, I hope you find the time to get back into the swing of it. You took the first step! Congrats! :)